Keeping in mind your police observatory skills, when you have accompanied David on the road, has it been easy for you to tell a true fan from one who has ulterior motives?
I can always tell a true fan, they have glazed eyes, never speak, always look at David when you talk to them and deliver photograph albums that just have photos of David in them and nobody else. The ones with the "motive" pay far too much attention to me and still don't include photos of anyone but David in the photograph albums.

What in your opinion constitutes a true fan?
The one who says - "So! He trod on my foot as he pushed past!! - I’ll get my shoe bronzed." (Does that mean kind of like being spit on from the stage when David sang "No Time" in Lake Tahoe? Well, why didn’t he say that?)

In the nicest possible way, what do you think fans want from David?
Most fans want time from David. (We agree. Ed.), which is just the one thing he can’t give to everyone - Fifty fans want five minutes conversation - not unreasonable _ five minutes, is it? It add up to over four hours!!!(Ohhhh - good looking and a scholar too!- Ed.)

How do you think most fans behave?
On the whole they behave very well and their minders aren’t too bad either. Those under Police escort are sometimes difficult. (Does x-police escort count?)

Again, keeping in mind this is a family newsletter, what kinds of fans do you think David enjoys meeting most?
David most likes those fans who don’t push into the dressing room after a show just as he gets out of the shower. He also likes those fans who don’t try to break his neck to show him they love him.

What do you think David considers to be a true fan?
He considers me a true fan but, then, he never was a good judge!

Ken had been advised he had the right to remain silent and anything he said can and would be used against him in MonkeeShines. Therefore, The Purple Flower Gang wishes to include the following disclaimer statement.

• I want to make it quite clear that I deny ever having written any of the above - it's all an obvious forgery and in any case the answers were obtained by undue pressure, probably by the illicit use of truth drugs and undeniably blackmail into the bargain. I never said it, I wouldn't say it and if you don't print it I will sue. -Ken Wilkinson